JNS
OneFamily hosts a retreat at the Kinneret for 400 parents of fallen soldiers and victims of terror.
On Yom Hazikaron (Memorial Day for Fallen Soldiers and Victims of Terror) this year, as the number of fallen fighters continues to rise from the ongoing Swords of Iron War, Israel is plunged into a state of national mourning.
Marc Belzberg, founder and chairman of OneFamily, the national organization dedicated to supporting victims of terror and their families, reflected: “Last year's Yom Hazikaron was unlike any we have known. And this year, even more so, nearly every Israeli—and countless Jews around the world—has a deep connection to someone lost to war and terror. We are all carrying a fragment of the grief that bereaved families endure daily.”
On the weekend before Yom Hazikaron, OneFamily hosted an annual three-day retreat at the Kinneret, offering 400 bereaved parents of fallen soldiers and victims of terror rest, support, practical tools and a charge of positive energy.
Throughout the retreat, families engaged in a variety of healing activities and, perhaps most importantly, found critical social support and emotional connection with others who share the same burden.
As one participant commented after prayers, lectures and discussions: “Everyone in this room lost a son or daughter fighting for this country. All 400 people. Every one of them has to face Yom Hazikaron honoring those who have fallen while protecting us.”
The retreat captured the true picture of mourning across Israeli society that would be mirrored at ceremonies nationwide. The bereaved parents, young and old, represented diverse backgrounds, from all corners of Israel, from every level of religious observance to a variety of cultural origins—Indian, Ethiopian, Russian, French, American, Sephardi and Ashkenazi. They came from the political left and right, from the north and south, from small towns and big cities.
They all carried the weight, the hole, the sadness of loss. For some, this was their first Yom Hazikaron without their child. For others, it has been years since their loss. Many return to the annual retreat, not only to receive support but also to offer it, paying it forward as part of their ongoing healing process.
For many, the pre-Memorial Day retreat is not merely a tradition but a necessity. “There aren’t the daily distractions from the grief on Yom Hazikaron," explained one parent. "We brace ourselves for the day all week. Getting away for the Shabbat before, with others going through it as well, makes all the difference.”
Yaron and Ayelet Fisher from the small community of Bruchin in Samaria are grieving the loss of their son Nevo, who was killed on Jan. 8, 2025. A tank commander in the IDF's 46th Armored Battalion, Staff Sgt. Nevo Fisher was killed in combat in the northern Gaza Strip at the age of 20.
“Every day is Memorial Day for us,” said Yaron. “We are in this all the time. Yom Hazikaron is the one day of the year that everyone else stops and is with us. We welcome it. We get to share our son’s story and mourn him as a community.”
Lisa Weinsof Zenilman of Ma'ale Adumim lost her son Ari on the third day of Chanukah, Dec. 10, 2023. Master Sgt. Ari Zenilman was killed while fighting in Khan Yunis, just a month before his 33rd birthday. The oldest of five children, Ari left behind his wife, Chava, and three young children, Achiya, Tali, and Maayan.
Ari attended the Har Etzion Hesder Yeshiva and served as a combat soldier in the Nachal Brigade. After completing his regular service, he continued to serve in a reserve unit, firmly believing that "his turn" had not ended.
In a letter to a young friend preparing for army service, he wrote: “Remember to look at the big picture…. You may feel like a cog in a machine and that machine may have its faults, but oh, what a machine it is. It is important that every soldier understand that it is his time and his turn.”
In early December, Ari’s unit was deployed to communities along the Gaza border—Kissufim, Kibbutz Re’im, Kfar Aza and later Nachal Oz. On Dec. 3, he called his parents and wife to let them know he was handing in his cellphone—an unspoken signal that he was entering Gaza. It was the last time they heard his voice.
“Losing Ari left a huge hole in all of our lives,” his mother shared. “It's a hole that will never be filled. But it's not a hole that stays the same forever. It's a little less than a year and a half now and I see the hole changing. Not shrinking or filling up, but changing.”
Lisa described how being around others facing similar grief has helped her move forward: “It has been helpful to spend time with peers who are going through very similar experiences and sharing thoughts. Time goes on and we also move on—still broken but not like in the beginning. Learning to hold the pieces together and keep moving forward.”
She added, “We're heading into our second Yom Hazikaron. The day is a very powerful experience. It’s the one day a year that we mourn our son, the soldier, rather than our son Ari.”
Marcy Oster, a resident of Karnei Shomron in Samaria, lost her son, Sgt. First Class (res.) Amichai Oster, 24, in Gaza on Jan. 1, 2024.
“This will be my second Yom Hazikaron as a bereaved parent, and it is the second time I have joined a OneFamily weekend for bereaved parents,” she shared. “Last year it was still pretty new, and I really benefited from talking to parents whose children were killed in previous wars—the ones who told us that the loss would hurt forever but that we would learn to feel happy again.”
“It's been a year and four months since our son Amichai fell in Gaza and it still feels very fresh. I was so sad to see so many new parents who have only the perspective of a few weeks or months," she added. "I wish there was something I could have said to them to take away what I know they are going through. But I think just being together and talking about our children and how we are dealing with our lives since that knock on the door is helpful.”
OneFamily has been supporting victims of terror and war for 23 years, offering year-round programming through four regional centers, a vast network of staff and volunteers, small support groups, camps and programs tailored to every age and stage of life, as well as hosting key retreats throughout the year.
OneFamily’s annual Yom Hazikaron ceremony was scheduled to be held on the evening of April 29 in Jerusalem and can be viewed from 7.30 p.m. in Israel via live stream at https://onefamilyfundus.org/yom-hazikaron-2025/.
